I am so blessed
Posted by Victoria Waldie on Saturday, August 21, 2010
Today was another day where my mind kept thinking about the journey we are going to be faced with very shortly. I am extremely scared, very nervous and immensely thrilled all at the same time. Kind of feels like I am back on the Clomid. :) Every day my thoughts are consumed of wanting a baby of my own so badly and wanting to begin a family for Corey and I. Last night at a friends birthday party I met up with a girl who I have only met once before and I suddenly felt compelled to tell her our story and share all of my fears, thoughts, and hopes with her.
Sometimes it is easier when it is someone we are not close to because you feel you can blab without any judgement at all. As I was telling this girl about everything she started using terms that not even my Mom and Sister can remember from what I have told them. She knew what an IUI was, she was asking about the Clomid, she knew of the Regional Fertility Clinic. It turns our her very best friend and husband are going through the same process and path that Corey and I have been on. She also told me that all of my fears and concerns and opinions were exactly what her best friend has always discussed with her.
The more we kept talking the more I started thinking to myself that I am a strong, brave woman who is loved so deeply by a caring, supportive Husband, and no longer did I have as many fears and worries about what the IVF process will be like. For a moment I felt like I was ready to take this huge step and put all of my worries of clotting and finances aside and do whatever it takes to bring a child into this world. I also thought, "How blessed am I? How blessed am I to have found this new friend and to have had the chance to share my story with her without embarassment or fear of judgement?".
Along this path that Corey and I have had to take, God has blessed us with a great support group. He has also brought two other great friends into my life to have as support and comfort during this difficult time. I am EXTREMELY thankful for a co-worker of mine who a year ago provided me much comfort and support and was open to answering all of my questions I have had. I am so lucky to have come across a friend such as her. She is a beautiful, smart and wonderful mother to a gorgeous baby boy who turns one very soon, and her and her Husband were blessed with him through the miracle of IVF. She has opened up to me about her story and I am so thankful that she has felt comfortable enough with me to tell me the ins and outs of her journey.
Just a few weeks ago, I also learned that a friend from high school and her Husband are also at the clinic going through treatment. And although her story and my story are different as to the reasons why we are experiencing conception difficulty we both have the msot important thing in common...we both just want to have the chance at having our own baby but we just need a little push to do so. It has been so nice having her to share her experiences with me and vice versa so I have been blessed with two great people. One who has experienced it and has been through it all and another who is on the same playing field as me and is currently going through treatment just as I am.
It's funny, when this all began and I was told that my chances of conceiving my own child were slim and that it was unknown how much longer my ovaries would work for, I felt alone. I felt lost. I had great friends and family to talk to, but I always felt that by my talking about it all the time, it was an annoyance or a burden on them. But that all has changed. I am starting to realize there are more people out there who struggle with this same issue and who have the same thoughts I have and the same dreams. I hate that they have to deal with it, because I know how hard it is...but it is nice having the sense of understanding from someone who knows just how it is.
With all of this support and friendship, I am as ready as I am going to be to get this treatment underway. September cannot come soon enough. The days will drag on, the weeks will creep by and then before I know it, Corey and I will be thrown into a whirlwind of hormones, needles, ultrasounds and embryo transfers. But the end result is worth it and already I wouldn't trade anything in the world for it. I cannot wait until the day I hold my baby in my arms and think of all we have been through to get to that point. That baby will be the most loved baby in the entire world.
The great thing is that he or she already is.
Sometimes it is easier when it is someone we are not close to because you feel you can blab without any judgement at all. As I was telling this girl about everything she started using terms that not even my Mom and Sister can remember from what I have told them. She knew what an IUI was, she was asking about the Clomid, she knew of the Regional Fertility Clinic. It turns our her very best friend and husband are going through the same process and path that Corey and I have been on. She also told me that all of my fears and concerns and opinions were exactly what her best friend has always discussed with her.
The more we kept talking the more I started thinking to myself that I am a strong, brave woman who is loved so deeply by a caring, supportive Husband, and no longer did I have as many fears and worries about what the IVF process will be like. For a moment I felt like I was ready to take this huge step and put all of my worries of clotting and finances aside and do whatever it takes to bring a child into this world. I also thought, "How blessed am I? How blessed am I to have found this new friend and to have had the chance to share my story with her without embarassment or fear of judgement?".
Along this path that Corey and I have had to take, God has blessed us with a great support group. He has also brought two other great friends into my life to have as support and comfort during this difficult time. I am EXTREMELY thankful for a co-worker of mine who a year ago provided me much comfort and support and was open to answering all of my questions I have had. I am so lucky to have come across a friend such as her. She is a beautiful, smart and wonderful mother to a gorgeous baby boy who turns one very soon, and her and her Husband were blessed with him through the miracle of IVF. She has opened up to me about her story and I am so thankful that she has felt comfortable enough with me to tell me the ins and outs of her journey.
Just a few weeks ago, I also learned that a friend from high school and her Husband are also at the clinic going through treatment. And although her story and my story are different as to the reasons why we are experiencing conception difficulty we both have the msot important thing in common...we both just want to have the chance at having our own baby but we just need a little push to do so. It has been so nice having her to share her experiences with me and vice versa so I have been blessed with two great people. One who has experienced it and has been through it all and another who is on the same playing field as me and is currently going through treatment just as I am.
It's funny, when this all began and I was told that my chances of conceiving my own child were slim and that it was unknown how much longer my ovaries would work for, I felt alone. I felt lost. I had great friends and family to talk to, but I always felt that by my talking about it all the time, it was an annoyance or a burden on them. But that all has changed. I am starting to realize there are more people out there who struggle with this same issue and who have the same thoughts I have and the same dreams. I hate that they have to deal with it, because I know how hard it is...but it is nice having the sense of understanding from someone who knows just how it is.
With all of this support and friendship, I am as ready as I am going to be to get this treatment underway. September cannot come soon enough. The days will drag on, the weeks will creep by and then before I know it, Corey and I will be thrown into a whirlwind of hormones, needles, ultrasounds and embryo transfers. But the end result is worth it and already I wouldn't trade anything in the world for it. I cannot wait until the day I hold my baby in my arms and think of all we have been through to get to that point. That baby will be the most loved baby in the entire world.
The great thing is that he or she already is.